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Texts From Dog

Author: October Jones
Publisher: HMH
ISBN: 0544080068
Size: 69.64 MB
Format: PDF, Mobi
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He’s a dog with a phone . . . My dog sends me texts. Yeah. It’s weird. When October Jones figured out he could send text messages to himself on his mobile phone, he naturally decided that the best use of this discovery was to send passive-aggressive messages to himself under the guise of his bulldog. And so the exasperating, slightly delusional, and utterly endearing Dog and his alter-ego, BatDog, were born. Texts from Dog features Dog’s attempts to keep the neighborhood safe from the likes of Mr. Postman and his arch-nemesis Cat-Cat—he has managed to only smash three TVs and a patio door in the process. And in between crime fighting sprees and run-ins with the squirrel mafia, there are romantic interludes with pillows, fetch sessions gone terribly awry, and the abusive banter only a bromance between man and his text-savvy dog can spawn. For those of us who have ever had a conversation with a pet in our heads, Texts from Dog will make you laugh out loud and perhaps even make you think twice about leaving your pet home alone for the day.

Crusoe The Celebrity Dachshund

Author: Ryan Beauchesne
Publisher: Macmillan
ISBN: 1250074398
Size: 37.63 MB
Format: PDF, ePub
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What? You've never heard of Crusoe, the Celebrity Dachshund?! You must be living under a rock!... Or at least that's what Crusoe thinks. Crusoe may be a small dog, but he's a big deal. He's the self-proclaimed "wiener dog who thinks he's more of a celebrity than he really is" (Until now!) and the star of his own wildly popular blog of the same name, winner of the 2013 and 2014 Best Pet Blog Award as well as the Most Humorous Blog and Best Blog of the Year at the 2015 Bloggies. Crusoe is talented, ridiculously photogenic, and proud of his larger-than-life personality, stunning fashion sense, and insatiable penchant for whimsy, as his many thousands of loyal followers can attest. Perhaps you know him better by his infamous alter ego, BATDOG? We thought so. Crusoe is so excited to share his wit and wisdom with all of his adoring fans. He is certain that his first book, featuring hundreds of photos, funny stories, delicious recipes, and helpful tips will make the perfect gift for dog-lovers of all ages.

You Had One Job

Author: Beverly L. Jenkins
Publisher: Andrews McMeel Publishing
ISBN: 1449480691
Size: 63.70 MB
Format: PDF, ePub
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If someone hangs a stop sign upside down or paints crooked lines on a highway, count on someone else to snap a photo and post it online. You Had One Job! is a collection of hilarious pictures features job-related disasters and general ineptitudes. All of these new, never-before-seen images will be accompanied by witty captions.

Texts From Mittens

Author: Angie Bailey
Publisher: Harlequin
ISBN: 1460380800
Size: 19.79 MB
Format: PDF, Docs
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Texts from Mittens is a series of text message conversations between a snappy, self-absorbed housecat named Mittens and his long-suffering human, a single woman who works away from home during the day. Mittens relentlessly hassles his human all day long, while only taking breaks to watch Judge Judy, hang with his best friend Stumpy, complain about the antics of Drunk Patty the neighbor, ask Grandma for money to buy useless items from QVC, and harass the "filthy beast" dog, Phil. Angie Bailey is an award-winning writer and blogger, humorist, and professional member of the Cat Writers' Association. Her primary blog, Catladyland, has won many awards, and her humor writing is featured nearly daily on Catster.com, one of the most popular cat sites on the Web. She loves to photograph her cats in silly poses and sleeps with one eye open. And yes, she has three cats. "Each installment of Texts From Mittens is like a little gift to brighten your day!" —Kate Benjamin, Hauspanther founder and co-author of Catification with Jackson Galaxy "Texts From Mittens makes me wish my cat had thumbs! This is a hilarious book; Angie Bailey has done it again!" —Jeremy Greenberg, Author of Sorry I Barfed on Your Bed "We all knew that cats were hilarious, but Ms. Bailey's sardonic cat quips really take their mannerisms, attitude and occasional apathy to another level." —Susan Michals, Curator of Cat Art Show Los Angeles Come home! There's an emergency! What?? Are you OK? My dish is half empty! I'll be home soon. You wish starvation upon me! Stop being dramatic. Am weeak. Caan hasrdly tyyppe. Are you going to wear those black pants on your bed? Yes. I have a date. They're comfortable. Mittens, get off my pants! FYI: Poly-blend makes your butt look big

Dog Shaming

Author: Pascale Lemire
Publisher: Three Rivers Press (CA)
ISBN: 0385349343
Size: 74.53 MB
Format: PDF, Docs
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Based on the web phenomenon Dogshaming and containing photos that are all-new and exclusive to the book, this hilarious album showcases adorable snapshots of shamed pups confessing their biggest - and grossest - sins.

The Little World Of Liz Climo

Author: Liz Climo
Publisher: Running Press
ISBN: 0762455462
Size: 40.30 MB
Format: PDF, Kindle
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Artist Liz Climo has charmed her fans with her comic world of whimsical animal characters, where everyone from grizzly bears, dinosaurs, rabbits, and anteaters grapple with everyday life with wit and humor. Through her comics, we discover that an armadillo can dress for Halloween, a dinosaur can be a loving parent ... and a rhino can squeeze orange juice! This new collection features more than 100 of her comics, starring her beloved characters in all kinds of funny situations, from celebrating holidays to helping friends.

The Dogist

Author: Elias Weiss Friedman
Publisher: Artisan Books
ISBN: 1579656714
Size: 45.47 MB
Format: PDF, ePub
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New York Times bestseller The Dogist is a beautiful, funny, and inspiring tribute to the beloved dogs in our lives. Every page presents dog portraits that command our attention. Whether because of the look in a dog's eyes, its innate beauty, or even the clothes its owner has dressed it in, the photos will make you ooh and aah, laugh, and fall in love. Photographed by Elias Weiss Friedman, aka The Dogist, every portrait in the book tells a story and explores the dog's distinct character and spirit. Themed sections include Puppies, Cones of Shame, Working Dogs, and Dogs in Fancy Outfits, giving every dog lover something to pore over.

My Dog The Paradox

Author: The Oatmeal
Publisher: Andrews McMeel Publishing
ISBN: 1449437710
Size: 11.56 MB
Format: PDF, ePub, Docs
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This eponymous comic became an instant hit when it went live on The Oatmeal.com and was liked on Facebook by 700,000 fans. Now fans will have a keepsake book of this comic to give and to keep. In My Dog: The Paradox, Inman discusses the canine penchant for rolling in horse droppings, chasing large animals four times their size, and acting recklessly enthusiastic through the entirety of their impulsive, lovable lives. Hilarious and heartfelt, My Dog: The Paradox eloquently illustrates the complicated relationship between man and dog. We will never know why dogs fear hair dryers, or being baited into staring contests with cats, but as Inman explains, perhaps we love dogs so much “because their lives aren’t lengthy, logical, or deliberate, but an explosive paradox composed of fur, teeth, and enthusiasm.”

Off The Leash It S A Dog S Life

Author: Rupert Fawcett
Publisher: Pan Macmillan
ISBN: 075226575X
Size: 55.27 MB
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In its first year as a daily cartoon blog on Facebook, Off The Leash developed a regular daily following of half a million dog lovers from around the world, and has become a place where people who are passionate about pooches share anecdotes, pictures and jokes. Capturing the secret thoughts and dreams of dogs, Rupert Fawcett's cartoons are brilliantly observed - and touchingly true to life. This third book, Off The Leash: It's A Dog's Life, celebrates the wonderful world we create for our dogs - from the gloriously cheeky pooches who steal our sofa space, out-smart cats and wrap us around their little paws, to the adoring four-legged friends who want nothing more than our complete and undivided attention. Featuring dogs of every size, shape and breed, these cartoons delightfully capture the glorious relationships between dogs and their owners.

The Best Of The Rejection Collection

Author: Matthew Diffee
Publisher: Workman Publishing
ISBN: 0761168664
Size: 58.59 MB
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It’s the best of the worst: 293 of the funniest cartoons rejected by The New Yorker but luckily for us, now in paperback and available to enjoy. The Rejection Collection brings together some of The New Yorker’s brightest talents—Roz Chast, Gahan Wilson, Sam Gross, Jack Zeigler, David Sipress, and more—and reveals their other side. Their dark side. Their juvenile side. Their sick side. Their naughty side. Their outrageous side. And what a treat. Ventriloquist dummy cartoons. Operating room cartoons. Bring your daughter to work day cartoons (the stripper, the prison guard on death row). Lots of couples in bed, quite a few coffins, wise-cracking animals—an obsessive’s plumbing of the weird, the scary, the off-the-wall, and done so without restraint. Every week The New Yorker receives 500 cartoon submissions, and rejects a great majority—mostly, of course, for not being funny enough. There’s no question why these were rejected, and it’s not for lack of laughs. One can almost hear Eustace Tilley sniffing, We are not amused.