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Forever Erma

Author: Erma Bombeck
Publisher: Open Road Media
ISBN: 1453290095
Size: 12.41 MB
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New York Times Bestseller: This anthology of Erma Bombeck’s most memorable and humorous essays is a tribute to one of America’s sharpest wits. When she began writing her regular newspaper column in 1965, Erma Bombeck’s goal was to make housewives laugh. Thirty years later, she had published more than four thousand columns, and earned countless laughs—from housewives, presidents, and everyone in between. With grace, good humor, and razor-sharp prose, she gently skewered every aspect of the American family. This collection holds the best of her columns—not just her famous quips, but also the heartbreaking observations that gave her writing such weight. In 1969, Erma wrote: “screaming kids, unpaid bills, green leftovers, husbands behind newspapers, basketballs in the bathroom. They’re real . . . they’re warm . . . they’re the only bit of normalcy left in this cockeyed world, and I’m going to cling to it like life itself.” With what Publishers Weekly calls her “infectious sense of human absurdity,” Erma Bombeck’s writing remains a timeless examination of the still-cockeyed world. This ebook features an illustrated biography of Erma Bombeck including rare images and never-before-seen documents from the author’s estate.

Aunt Erma S Cope Book

Author: Erma Bombeck
Publisher: Open Road Media
ISBN: 1453290079
Size: 64.57 MB
Format: PDF, Mobi
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The #1 New York Times bestseller about one woman’s doomed quest for self-improvement by a writer “blessed with the comic equivalent of perfect pitch” (The Boston Globe). As far as Erma can tell, her life is going well. Her children speak to her, her husband smiles at her, and she’s capable of looking in a mirror without screaming. But her friends know better. No matter how happy Erma thinks she is, she’s in need of help, and the only way to fulfillment is a ten-foot stack of self-improvement books. From Sensual Needlepoint to Fear of Buying, Erma will try them all. One book recommends bringing roleplay into the bedroom, so she dresses up in her son’s football pads. She tries to meditate but gets stuck in the lotus position. She spends more time in the kitchen but only succeeds in melting her son’s retainer. No matter how hard she tries to improve her family life, her schemes keep backfiring. As she soon learns, you may not always be able to fix what’s not broken—but with enough self-help books, you can break anything you want. This ebook features an illustrated biography of Erma Bombeck including rare images and never-before-seen documents from the author’s estate.

At Wit S End

Author: Erma Bombeck
Publisher: Fawcett
ISBN: 030777824X
Size: 26.24 MB
Format: PDF, ePub
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"America's irrepressible doyenne of domestic satire." THE BOSTON GLOBE Madcap, bittersweet humor in classic Erma Bombeck-style. You'll laugh until it hurts and love it! "Any mother with half a skull knows that when Daddy's little boy becomes Mommy's little boy, the kid is so wet, he's treading water. What do you mean you're a participle in the school play and you need a costume? Those rotten kids. If only they'd let me wake up in my own way. Why do they have to line up along my bed and stare at me like Moby Dick just washed up onto a beach somewhere?"

The Grass Is Always Greener Over The Septic Tank

Author: Erma Bombeck
Publisher: Open Road Media
ISBN: 1453290060
Size: 24.68 MB
Format: PDF, Kindle
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The “marvelously funny” and much-loved humorist explores the perils of suburban living in this New York Times bestseller (Vogue). For years, the Bombecks have heard rumors of a magical land called Suburbia where the air is clean, the grass is trimmed, and children don’t risk getting mugged on their walk to school. After watching their friends flee the city for subdivided utopias like Bonaparte’s Retreat and Mortgage Mañana, Erma and her family load up their belongings and cry, “Station wagons . . . ho!” But life on the suburban frontier is not as perfect as they had hoped. The trees are stunted, the house is cramped, and there’s no grass at all. But the Bombecks will make do, for they are suburbanites now—the last true pioneers! This ebook features an illustrated biography of Erma Bombeck including rare images and never-before-seen documents from the author’s estate.

When God Created Mothers

Author: Erma Bombeck
Publisher: Andrews McMeel Publishing
ISBN: 0740787772
Size: 18.23 MB
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Erma Bombeck remains one of America's favorite humorists. When God Created Mothers republishes one of her most popular Mother's Day columns as an illustrated keepsake book that offers a touching description of all the characteristics a mother must possess. When it first appeared in Erma Bombeck's Mother's Day column in 1974, When God Created Mothers was an instant success, clipped from newspapers, tucked into purses, and tacked onto refrigerators all over America. Now in this beautiful keepsake edition, Bombeck's moving words are paired with original art that bring to life the warm portrait of motherhood contained within. An angel marvels at the detail and overtime that the good Lord is putting into his creation of mothers. Despite the six pairs of hands and the three pairs of eyes that every mother needs, the angel thinks she has discovered a flaw: "There's a leak," she pronounced. "I told you that you were trying to put too much into this model." "It's not a leak," said the Lord. "It's a tear." "What's it for?" "It's for joy, sadness, disappointment, pain, loneliness and pride." "You are a genius," said the angel. The Lord looked somber, "I didn't put it there." Every mother will treasure this moving tribute, penned by America's most beloved expert on motherhood.

Erma Bombeck

Author: Susan Edwards
Publisher:
ISBN: 9780380974825
Size: 61.94 MB
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A celebration of the life and works of Erma Bombeck chronicles her experiences, dedication to laughter, and irreverence for long-held traditions, which were shaped by her battle with cancer. 50,000 first printing.

If Life Is A Bowl Of Cherries What Am I Doing In The Pits

Author: Erma Bombeck
Publisher: Open Road Media
ISBN: 1453290109
Size: 71.50 MB
Format: PDF, Mobi
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The hilarious #1 New York Times bestseller: Erma Bombeck’s take on marriage and family life is “fun from cover to cover” (Hartford Courant). Ever since she was a child, Erma Bombeck has been an expert worrier, and married life has only honed that skill. She gets anxious about running out of ball bearings; about snakes sneaking in through the pipes; about making meaningful conversation on New Year’s Eve. Married life, she realizes, is an unpredictable saga even when you know exactly how loud your husband snores every night—and she wouldn’t have it any other way. In this crisp collection of essays, Bombeck shows off the irresistible style that made her one of America’s favorite humorists for more than three decades. When she sharpens her wit, no family member is sacred and no self-help fad is safe. This ebook features an illustrated biography of Erma Bombeck including rare images and never-before-seen documents from the author’s estate.

Erma Bombeck

Author: Erma Bombeck
Publisher: Fawcett Books
ISBN: 9780449212585
Size: 26.33 MB
Format: PDF, Kindle
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Featuring some of the best writing of the late bestselling author, this set contains At Wit's End, If Life Is a Bowl of Cherries What Am I Doing in the Pits?, Just Wait Till You Have Children of Your Own and The Grass Is Always Greener Over the Septic Tank.

Motherhood

Author: Erma Bombeck
Publisher: Open Road Media
ISBN: 1453290087
Size: 48.47 MB
Format: PDF
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A look at one of the toughest jobs on earth, from the woman who perfectly captures life’s humor and heart Anyone who thinks motherhood is easy has never had children. To care for children, a husband, and oneself is a superhuman task, and any woman who appears to be expert at doing all three simultaneously is not Supermom—she’s a good actress. For three decades, Erma Bombeck chronicled motherhood’s daily frustrations and victories. In this classic anthology, she presents all sorts of mothers, and even a stay-at-home dad, on good days and bad. With hilarious anecdotes and deep compassion, she shows that there is no other profession that demands so much, and rewards so highly. This ebook features an illustrated biography of Erma Bombeck including rare images and never-before-seen documents from the author’s estate.